1. Become an RCMP officer.

2. Taser your victim five times. Make sure you start within 25 seconds of encountering him, even if he calms down after you show up; don’t wait until someone who speaks your victim’s language arrives; don’t try to talk him down or use any other means of dealing with the situation.

3. Confiscate any eyewitness video of the incident. Tell the witnesses you’ll give back the video within 48 hours, then refuse to return it until a court forces you to.

4. Lie to the media about what happened. Repeatedly.

5. Make sure Canada Border Services Agency “accidentally” deletes CCTV footage of your victim’s behavior in the hours leading up to the murder. It won’t help you one way or another, but it could help them — and it was their incompetence that got you involved in the first place.

6. Allege that your victim died as a result of alcohol abuse, even if he has no alcohol in his system when you murder him.

7. Make sure your fellow officers, rather than civilians, get to decide whether you should face charges. They’ll let you get away with it.